the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
