I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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