The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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