But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
