i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Green mimosas i think yes
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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