Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
