dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
These tits shall not be calmed
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
