i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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