He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
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