I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
