Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
there was a trapeze. enough said
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
