I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
