Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Randomize
