Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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