he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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