She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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