i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
