living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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