I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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