We're like a lot better than the average bears
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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