Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
