Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
