My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
