I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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