Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
