O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
