I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
