Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I lost the right to judge tonight
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize