Me too!
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
