he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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