So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
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