You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
