Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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