Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
