he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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