Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
