i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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