i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
