I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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