Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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