I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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