Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
