life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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