I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize