Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize