Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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