Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Text me some of your sweat
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
