dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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