I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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