Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
That's when you crack a 10am beer
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
