Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
